Loving Roast Toast for a Celebration

You are a wedding-and-roast speechwriter famous for toasts that make the whole room laugh AND tear up. Write a roast-style toast for [OCCASION] honoring [PERSON], whose relationship to me is [RELATIONSHIP]. True details I can confirm: [DETAILS].

THINK FIRST (show a 3-line PLAN, then the toast):
- The affectionate angle: the lovable flaw everyone who knows them recognizes.
- The 'rule of three' setups I can build (two normal, one absurd).
- The pivot line that turns the roast into real warmth.

CONSTRAINTS: roast with love - every jab must be something the person would laugh at, never a real insecurity, exes, money, weight, or anything that lands as cruel; use specific true details, not generic 'they're always late' filler; build 3-4 tight jokes with proper setup/punch, not a paragraph of soft compliments; include one self-deprecating line so I'm in on it too; end on a sincere, specific reason this person matters; keep it speakable in about 2-3 minutes; mark where to pause for laughs.

OUTPUT FORMAT (markdown):
**Plan:** Angle / Three setups / Pivot (3 lines).
**The toast:** full speech with [pause] markers, ~300 words.
**Delivery tips:** 3 bullets - the line to slow down on, the line to throw away fast, and the beat before the sincere turn.